To call the walls to dust we need to recognise the power issues. As a detached youth worker often when we first meet a group we say something like, “we are around every week but you don’t have to chat to us if you don’t want, you can tell us to get lost if you like” at which point some likely lad usually says ‘fuck off then” and so we immediately turn to leave” 9 times out of 10 they will say “I didn’t mean it mate, come back”

The issues around power are very embedded in our psyche and relate to approaches to truth, need, and value systems, how we semiotic fluid of culture that we all swim in and that we are drenched in a binary either or system, but relationship calls us beyond these dichotomies. So whilst kenosis is a helpful concept it is easier said than done, and that our ability to embrace kenosis is in itself a paradox.